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A goat path to fulfillment and a blood moon eclipse
We often have 8 lane highways that are our go-to behaviours that determine our direction in life. They’re easy. They’re comfortable. We don’t have to think about them. But what if fulfillment and happiness and joy are off the beaten path? And what if your family and friends aren’t on the same road as you? Choosing a new path is difficult and hard. Do you hold yourself and the ones you love as capable of change?
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Showing up in the world
I caught a glimpse of my reflection today in an airport duty free window, and thought WOW! I don’t look at all like I think I do. I’m shorter than I feel. Softer. Older. Grumpier. It made me think of how I show up in the world. I wondered how many other people are walking around with their inner selves feeling disconnected from their outer selves. I flew out to Saskatchewan to see my boys on the weekend, which meant airports, small talk and interesting conversations with strangers. I’m never one to shy away from conversations. I love hearing people’s stories, and I find airports seem to be the space…
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Our ineptitude for grief
Today the Go Fund Me page will be taken down for the survivors and families of the Humboldt Broncos tragedy. Smart move by Kevin Garinger. He seems like a very intelligent man. Every day I’m seeing posts on Twitter and the news about services being held for the victims. We’re learning about the whole person, rather than the hockey player, the background to the names and faces that have been etched into our minds over the past two weeks. It’s hard to believe it’s only been two weeks! Slowly, other news items are creeping in, and a nation’s attention shifts back to mindless scrolling through political tensions, racism, sexism, any…
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Well I’m glad THAT’S over!!
What a crazy day! Started with the thought “I have all morning to relax before being picked up at 11:30”. I sat down, ate my oatmeal and put on the U.S. Open to watch me some golf. Phone rang. It’s the cancer agency saying that my blood work from yesterday has come back with blood counts too low for chemo, and could I please come and get more blood work done NOW so they can make a decision on whether I can follow through with it. So I lost the morning, and then waited and waited and waited to see if my new blood counts were better. Best part is…
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Timing is everything
I’m such a control freak. I have been scared to death, cut open, poisoned, and basically made androgynous, but the hardest part of this whole ride has been about time. I was going to say waiting, but that’s only part of it. The concept of TIME covers waiting, healing, counting the days between treatments, knowing when I do or don’t or will or won’t need help, planning my days, planning my future, and waiting some more. TIME has been my largest struggle. I should have known it would be an issue when time stood still after my diagnosis. Then there was the wait for a surgery date, while fielding a…
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Shit people say….
Today I’ve run into a sort of theme. It started innocently enough by an internet troll trying to sell me some multilevel supplement that “will change my life”. I was feeling somewhat adventurous so I responded, mostly to her marketing technique of trolling her friends’ facebook friends and hoping for a bite, and we got into a bit of a conversation about “what’s best for me.” I finally told her sorry, I can’t do her supplement because I’m doing chemo, and she responded with a list of people she knows who have died of cancer, and how it only affects the strongest people, etc etc etc. Her logic was way…
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The stigma of suffering alone
Many, many people have sent me notes and messages thanking me for being so open about my journey through cancer. To be honest, my first thought has always been – well did you expect any otherwise from me? I’ve always been a pretty open book, and I’ve rarely been one to keep my mouth shut on anything (although to be fair, I’m getting much much better at that as I grow older and wiser. Or maybe it’s just learning from my mistakes…. either way…..). But as I think further about it, I realize that the majority of people are not the same as me. Many people go through this alone,…
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My story
Where to start. Well I suppose that’s easy. Buckle up – this will be a long one. In October of 2014, I went to the doctor for my annual check up. All was well, no issues, no lumps. I asked my doc if now that I’m 41 I should start getting regular mammograms. She told me that “actually, they are now recommending that women without any family history or palpable lumps or issues can probably wait until they turn 50 to go for regular screening”. So I said ok then!! December 2014, I got an email at work that the BC Cancer Agency was bringing a mobile screening clinic to UVic…
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Let me introduce myself……
I know you’ll inevitably check out the the “About me” section, but I thought I’d start off with a bit of the who what why of this blog. My name is Teri. I am a 41 year old mom of two, wife of one, who pretty much just likes to say it as it is. I have breast cancer. There, I said it. As it is. It’s a funny thing, this cancer thing. Everyone seems to react to that word differently. I have a lot of people saying things like “oh you’re so positive!” and “aren’t you angry?” – well the truth is, I’m positive because it’s the only way…